


Ruth and Grandma Lose Cameron Post, Cameron Moves On

by headabovewater



Category: The Miseducation of Cameron Post - Emily M. Danforth
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-09-29 16:07:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17206571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/headabovewater/pseuds/headabovewater
Summary: Chapter 1Cameron Post walks away from God's Promise with Jane Fonda and Adam Red Eagle. Her aunt and grandmother experience the consequences of forcing their niece/grandchild into a gay conversion camp against her will.Chapter 2Cameron makes a new life for herself in Seattle.Chapter 3Five years after escaping God's Promise, Cameron returns for a visit to Miles City.





	1. Ruth and Grandma deal with Cameron's escape from God's Promise

Ruth and Grandma were having dinner when the doorbell rang. It was Pastor Crawford and he had a serious, worried look on his face. “May I come in?” he said. “I’m sorry to disturb your dinner but this news cannot wait”.

Ruth showed them all to the living room, but she already had a knot in her stomach. Crawford wouldn’t be coming by and interrupting dinner for good news.

“I’ll get right to the point. I just got off the phone with Reverend Rick, and Cameron is missing from God’s Promise”. Ruth let out this little gasp, and Grandma just burst into tears. Ruth continued, almost hyperventilating. “What do you mean missing? When? How?”

Crawford continued. “Reverend Rick tells me that yesterday Cameron and two other disciples went on a day hike to a picnic area some distance from the camp. They were expected back by late afternoon but never returned. Reverend Rick and some disciples took a four-wheeler and searched the entire trail but there was no sign of them. They called the State Police yesterday evening, but it was getting dark, so they couldn’t do anything till morning. They have been searching all day today with no luck. The trooper in charge is Steven Dodds.” Crawford gave Ruth a scrap of paper. “This is his phone number”.

Trooper Dodds was a twenty-year veteran of the State Police and a lifelong resident of the area around God’s Promise. He was familiar with the camp and vehemently disagreed with its mission and methods.

“I want to talk to this Dodds guy right now! And either Rick or Lydia!”, Ruth shouted. Pastor Crawford calmly said, “I’ll try to get the trooper on the phone right now.”

He got through immediately and introduced himself and said he was with Ruth Post, Cameron Post’s aunt and legal guardian and also Cameron’s grandmother. He let him know that everyone was on a speakerphone and all would appreciate any information he could give on the search for Cameron and her two companions. “No problem”, he said. Ruth immediately started crying and said “Where is my niece? Please tell me you can find her.”

Trooper Dodds said “We have searched all day and have found no trace of them. Ms. Post, we are convinced that Cameron and her friends have deliberately run away. We don’t believe this is case of hikers getting lost. The trail they took is well marked, the weather was excellent, and one of the three had excellent outdoor skills.”

Dodds continued “Most everyone at the camp was forced to be there against their will. Was your niece there voluntarily?” Ruth admitted “No, she wasn’t. She had fallen into serious sin and needed spiritual guidance and correction before she was lost to Satan forever.”

“I understand that you feel she should be have been there, but I am guessing she didn’t. It’s very common and understandable that people held against their wishes often come to a point where they feel escape is their only option. She has run away. She could even be out of the state by now. There really isn’t much we can do except put out bulletins asking police to be on the lookout for your niece and the other two. I must tell you however, you are not likely to see her again until she decides she wants to contact you”.

Ruth’s heart sank, she sobbed and said “Thank you. Please call me if you have any more news”.

Grandma stopped sobbing, and you could see anger rising in her face. “Why did you send her to that awful place? It was supposed to cure her lesbian urges, but it looks like she hasn’t changed one bit, and now we have lost her. Who knows when or if we will see her again? Where is she? Will she be living on the streets? “

She kept going. “I blame myself for this too. I didn’t think it was the right thing to do when you sent her away, but I stayed quiet. You are her legal guardian, and I deferred to you. She was so unhappy when she was home at Christmas break, and I should have done more to find out how she was feeling and what I could do to help. And she has only said a few civil words to you Ruth since you sent her away”

Pastor Crawford stepped in to defend sending Cameron away to God’s Promise. “Cameron was sinning against God’s plan for men and women. Her sexual deviancy is an affront to the Lord. She had already led Coley Taylor into sin putting both their souls at risk. Our duty to Cameron was to rid her of her deviant urges, and God’s Promise was the perfect place to do that”

Grandma retorted angrily. “Some perfect place! She is still the same as she always was, but worse than that now she’s gone. How are we going to help and guide her when we no longer have any relationship with her? I never thought sending her away would end up costing me my granddaughter!”

Crawford replied. “Don’t panic. Maybe she will show up in a few days. It’s in God’s hands now, you must pray that he will show her the way”

Ruth interjected. “We need to call Promise to find out what they can tell us.” Lydia answered the call and was cold and distant. She was angry at Cameron for running away but showed little concern for her physical well-being. All she said was “Cameron was doing well in school and had just completed final exams but wasn’t doing so well in understanding the reasons for her sinful same sex attractions. Satan surely has her in his ugly grip, and he convinced her to run away and continue sinning. God’s Promise could not do anything more for her. We will pray for her redemption.”

Ruth was shaking and crying. “What can we do? What can we do?” Pastor Crawford said. “For right now, let’s pray that our Lord and Saviour will keep Cameron safe, and guide her to return to us. Ruth and Grandma both prayed, but privately neither of them believed they would see Cameron anytime soon.

Just after Cameron ran away, Ruth felt tremendous guilt for sending her to Promise. Up until Cam bolted from the camp, Ruth hadn’t wavered in her conviction that God’s Promise was the right thing for Cam, despite Cam’s anger at Ruth for sending her there. But now that it had all gone off the rails, she thought maybe her decision was wrong. Pastor Crawford kept assuring her that she had made the right decision, and neither she nor God’s Promise were responsible for Cam’s running away. It took a month or so, but Ruth re-convinced herself that her decisions all along were correct, and that It was Cam’s sin, and Cam’s sin alone, that led to the current mess.  
This infuriated Grandma. She didn’t know much about God’s Promise, and she believed Cam’s lesbian relationships were wrong. But what she did know is she used to have a beautiful cheerful granddaughter, and after she was sent away she became very unhappy. The Cam at Christmas break was not the Cam that she had seen grow from a happy baby to a beautiful young woman. It was Ruth, and God’s Promise that killed Cam’s spirit. And now her granddaughter was gone. Resentment grew between her and Ruth and they became more like roommates than family.

Ruth talked to Jamie and Coley and asked them if they had heard from Cam. Neither had. All she could do was plead with them that if Cam called to give her the message that they loved her and wanted to speak to her.

Ruth reached out to the local police chief, Robert “Bob” Hofmeister asking him to monitor police bulletins about missing persons, arrests, accidents anything where Cameron’s name might come up. Nothing ever did, but he held out hope that once Cameron turned eighteen and was a legal adult and not subject to Ruth forcing her to do something against her will that they might hear from her.

But, a few weeks went by, then a few months, then a few months more and nothing. On Cam’s eighteenth birthday they waited for a phone call or a knock on the door. Nothing. They sat alone in their living room. On that day, which should have been a joyful celebration of one of life’s milestones but was instead just empty and lonely, even Ruth questioned the wisdom of sending Cameron to God’s Promise.

Cam was gone. Ruth prayed to God every day to save her ‘wayward niece’, Grandma just cried herself to sleep every night.


	2. Cameron makes a new life for herself in Seattle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cameron makes it to Seattle, finds love, and graduates from high school. With a little help from her friends.

Cameron, Jane, and Adam left Quake Lake the next morning and hitchhiked to Bozeman. They wanted to get there as quickly as possible and hopefully find Mona Harris, where they hoped they could crash and hide out from the police search that was surely underway. Cameron had the phone book page with a listing for a Mona Harris on Willow Way that she had ripped out of a phone booth directory at Perkins just a few days previous when they were celebrating finishing their finals at Lifegate Christian.

It was the right address, it was Sunday and Mona was home. On opening the door, Mona just stared at Cam for a moment, and then blurted out “What the fuck are you doing here?” Cam pleaded “Me and my friends just escaped from God’s Promise, a gay conversion camp we were forced into attending. These are my friends, Jane and Adam. We need your help, please!”

  
Cam was a bundle of emotions. On one hand, she was happy (almost euphoric) to have escaped Promise and it’s constant emotional abuse trying to change the unchangeable, but at the same time was fearful of being caught and sent back to Promise or some place worse.

“Come in, come in now” said Mona.

They had barely sat down, and Cam launched into the story of God’s Promise and how she ended up there. “Coley Taylor and I were caught in bed by her brother Ty. Coley’s Mom got involved, Pastor Crawford went to Ruth, and Ruth (at Crawford’s urging) decided I needed to be shipped off to this religious camp to cure me of my ‘sinful same sex attractions’. Jane and Adam have their own similar stories.”

“Jane and I don’t intend to stay in Montana, if we can arrange it. I’m not sure Adam knows exactly what he will do. Because we are minors, we need to stay under the radar until we are 18 or we risk being sent back. Can we crash for a few days till we get our shit together?”

Cam added. "We need to make some phone calls. I have money to pay for them."

Cam immediately phoned Lindsey in Seattle and gave her the story about the last year of her life. Lindsey replied. “I knew something was really fucked up when Ruth told me that you were away at school and could not be contacted. I didn’t believe her for a minute.”

“Can I come stay with you for a while, please”, Cam asked hopefully.” I don’t know where else to go.”. “Absolutely”, said Lindsey. “I’ll have to talk about with my Mom, but she’s cool and I don’t think it will be a problem. When can you be here?”

“Well, we are still trying to figure stuff out, but probably 2-3 days.”

Cam continued. “And very important, Ruth will likely be calling you soon trying to track me down. You never heard from me, right?” “Right”, Lindsey assured her.

Adam really had nowhere to go, but he said he was just going to start from scratch. He knew it couldn’t be in Bozeman, too close to Promise and probably ground zero in the police search. Another city, better yet another state would be best. He was going to phone his mother, who didn’t support his being sent to Promise but had no say as his father had custody of him after the divorce.

Jane, ever the planner piped up. “You know, we can’t just hop a bus out of town. You can be sure our smiling faces are already posted behind every ticket counter at the bus station. That’s probably the first place the cops are hoping we show up. How about if I ask my friend if she can come here and pick us three up and drive to Idaho, then we go our separate ways.”

“Fantastic, if she’s willing” agreed the other two.

Cam was unsure of whether Ruth would contact Margot Keenan, so she phoned her and told her of the escape and her plan to go to Seattle and begged her not to tell Ruth. Margot said Cam’s parents would never have sent her away like that, and she promised to keep Cam’s secret. And she repeated, just as she had at their dinner back in Miles City that she would help her in any way she could.

A few more phone calls, and it was all set. The trio would be leaving Bozeman, and Montana, in three days.

Since keeping in touch would be a challenge, Mona agreed to play mailbox and message centre, keeping track of addresses and phone numbers as the three moved around. All three vowed to do their best to keep in touch.

They went with Jane’s friend to Pocatello, Idaho near where Jane’s old commune was. Jane crashed with her friend, Cameron got the first bus to Seattle, and Adam was going to try and get a job and survive in Pocatello, his new but hopefully temporary home. Cameron and Jane scraped together a few bucks for him, to be added to the $500 his mother sent to him.

They hugged and cried as they left, but they were absolutely committed to keeping in touch and reuniting as often as possible. “Friends for life” all three said in unison, hands clasped. But they were also all frightened about what the future held.

When Cameron arrived at Lindsey’s, she repeated once more the story of her and Promise. Lindsey’s mother was horrified and told Cam she could live with them, at least until she turned eighteen. Getting work was difficult without proper ID, like a birth certificate, which she couldn’t get without Ruth’s signature until she was 18. But she found places that were willing to hire her and just pay cash. She cleaned houses, worked as a server in restaurants with questionable employment practices, whatever it took to survive.

Cameron was at first a bit overwhelmed with everything going on in the gay community in the city. Lindsey was taking her to event after event. Cam wasn’t the activist that Lindsey was, but she really began to appreciate a city where she could openly be herself. What a difference from Miles City!

She made lots of new friends.

Cam’s eighteenth birthday came. No more fear of being caught and forced to do something or go somewhere against her will! She planned to apply for a new copy of her birth certificate now that she could do it on her own, get her school transcripts from Custer and Lifegate Christian, and register for high school (part-time) to finish her credits and graduate.

That morning, Jane called. Jane was now working as a photography assistant in a studio and taking courses part time.

“Hey, Ms. Legal Adult, how does it feel to be free?” “Great” replied Cam.

Jane continued “So are you going to tell Ruth where you are and what you are doing?”

“Nope” replied Cam. “I actually have no desire to see Ruth or even Grandma right now. Not exactly sure why. Probably I‘m just still bitter about what they put me through. And, you know I want my life to progress a bit before I contact them. Right now, I’m still just a teenage runaway high school dropout. I want to at least be a high school graduate before I emerge from the shadows. Does that make any sense to you?”

Jane said. “Yeah, that makes perfect sense to me. But what I think is irrelevant. If it’s right for you, it’s right ---period.”

Soon after Cameron’s 18th birthday, she and Lindsey got a small apartment. Cam was working about 30 hours a week to pay for her share of expenses, and that limited the course load she could take. She expected it to take up to three years to graduate, but she was going to do whatever it took.

Just after she turned nineteen, she met and fell in love with Judy who was a couple years older than her and they moved into their own place. Judy worked full time in retail. Cameron continued part time work and part time school, they needed both incomes to survive.

Cam and Margot kept in touch and true to her word, Margot helped financially a few times when Cam and Judy were in dire financial straits. But, for the most part Cam and Judy supported themselves. They were poor, but they survived.

Just before her 21st birthday, Cameron passed her last course and graduated with honors! The grad ceremony was very emotional, it had been a long hard haul, but Cam did it, and she was rightly proud of herself. Judy, Margot, Jane, Adam, Lindsey and her Mom, Mona, and lots of friends were there.

She also announced her intention (Judy already knew of course) to enroll in college, probably kinesiology given her love of sports. She had taken her SAT exams but didn’t yet have her results. But she was going to be on a college campus as soon as she could.

At the celebration dinner after the ceremony, Cam pulled aside Margot, Jane, and Adam and said, “I’m ready to visit Miles City.”


	3. Cam visits Miles City.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five years after escaping from God's Promise, Cam visits Miles City to see Ruth and Grandma.

Cameron, Judy, Lindsey and her mom were enjoying brunch at Lindsey’s mom’s house the morning after the graduation ceremony along with Jane, Adam, Margot and Mona who were all going back home that day. They were recalling both good times and bad times over the last 4-5 years.

 

Jane piped up “So, were you serious last night saying you would like to visit Miles City?” “Yeah”, Cam said “I think so.” Jane continued “But what do you want to accomplish? What’s in it for you?”  Cam thought for a minute “Well, selfishly I kinda want to show myself off. I’ve got my shit together, I’m fully out of the closet and proud of it, I have the greatest girlfriend in the world, and I’m about to go to college.” Jane conceded “Well, Ruth and Grandma will share your sentiments on the college thing, don’t expect any high fives on the other stuff.”

 

“Well, maybe not” Cam said, recognizing that Jane had a point. “But I want to try to resume some type of relationship with them. And even if it’s a total disaster, I guess I do owe them the courtesy of letting them know I’m OK.  And I want to see them in the flesh”.

 

Adam said. “You know, except for seeing them, you can do a lot of that by simply writing each of them a long letter.”

 

Cam insisted. “I really want to go there. Literally show up unannounced, like a ghost from the past. If they know I’m coming, they will probably have Crawford there ready to do an intervention or some other crazy shit. Anyway, not going to worry about it right now. Gotta save for travel expenses.”

 

Margot said. “Please let me pay for the trip so you can do it right now. I think you should do it as soon as possible, before you get involved in school again. I agree with Jane, I doubt it will have a totally happy ending. And Cam, you are absolutely right about showing up unannounced. If Ruth had even an hour’s advance notice of your arrival, she would be on the phone to Crawford and he would be waiting for you at the house.

 

Cam smiled. “Thank you so much, Margot. I’ll start planning, I think I can do it in three days. Fly to Billings on a Friday, getting a car rental and motel. Drive early in the morning Saturday to Miles City, arriving around 9 or 10. Saturday morning is the only time that they are guaranteed to be home. Ruth and Ray work Monday to Friday, and they stay home Saturday morning to just relax. Saturday afternoon they often go out, or they did five years ago, and Sunday is church of course. I’ll go to the house, and whatever happens, happens. Drive back to Billings that afternoon/evening, stay over, back home Sunday. I’ll only need to take one day off work.”

 

Two weeks later, Cameron was on her way. As planned, she flew into Billings on Friday and drove to Miles City Saturday morning. She wasn’t sure how she would react to being back after nearly five years, but as she drove down Main Street, she felt like she was just going through some random western town. Everything looked the same, but it didn’t feel like ‘home’ or ‘her town’. She found that upsetting.

 

She pulled into the driveway of her old house on Wibaux Street, took a deep breath, and walked up to the porch and rang the doorbell. She stepped back a bit so that she was in the middle of the porch, not right at the door.

 

Ruth opened the door. She had this puzzled look on her face, not really seeming to know who she was looking at. She was frozen. Cam looked much like she did the last time Ruth saw her, Christmas break of the year she was in Promise, except that she now had much shorter hair. Cam thought Ruth looked better than the last time she saw her. Less tired looking., she thought. Cam said nothing, waiting for Ruth to make the first move. Ruth kept staring at her for what seemed like an eternity, but it was probably only about 10-15 seconds. Ruth regained her composure, and shouted downstairs stuttering “Eleanor, C-C-C-Cameron is here”.

 

Grandma let out a scream, and Cam heard her feet pounding up the stairs from the basement. At the top of the stairs, she spotted Cam standing out on the porch. She yelled “Cammie you’ve come back!” as she ran out onto the porch, gently pushing Ruth aside as she went through the front door which Ruth was partially blocking. She held Cam in a big bear hug, crying, and kept saying over and over “You’re back, you’re back!”  Cam didn’t hug her in return but she didn’t push her away either.  She finally let go and led Cam to the couch in the living room brushing past Ruth who was still frozen in the doorway. As they both sat down on the couch, Ruth moved to the club chair and sat there silently.

 

Grandma said. “Do you want something to drink?”  “Just water, thanks.”

 

While Grandma went into the kitchen, Ruth and Cameron sat staring at each other, not really knowing what to say. Finally, Cam said “I’m just here for a short visit, I’m leaving for Billings later today.”

 

Ruth called Ray in from the backyard. He did a double take on seeing Cameron, and just kind of whispered “Hi Cameron.” Cam gave a little nod and Ray sat in a chair in a corner of the living room.

 

Grandma returned with water glasses, and a plate of low sugar cookies. She sat close to Cam, and said “Where are you living?” Cam replied “I am living in Seattle with Judy, my partner for about two years. I have lived in Seattle ever since I escaped from God’s Promise, but I only met Judy about two years ago. Grandma, we are so in love! I am so lucky we found each other, I can’t wait for you to meet her”.

 

Grandma shifted uncomfortably. “You mean you and another girl are living together, like a married couple?” Cameron didn’t want to start the conversation off with a conflict, but she knew she had to deal with the cards she was dealt, and she wasn’t going to be evasive in her answer. “Yes, Grandma we are a couple. A lesbian couple. We are just like any heterosexual couple, except that we are not legally married because the state doesn’t allow it. Yet. Someday we will be married.”  Grandma sobbed a tiny bit and said “That’s not right, Cammie. That’s just not right.” Ruth, finally finding her voice said. “That’s a very grave sin Cameron!”

 

This isn’t going well, Cam thought silently.

 

Even though Ruth and Grandma knew Cam was a lesbian ever since they shipped her off to get fixed at God’s Promise, Cameron realized that she had never explicitly come out to them.

 

Cam started slowly and deliberately. “Ruth, Grandma. I am a lesbian. I have known my whole life that I am only sexually attracted to girls. And I believe God made me this way and approves of my lifestyle. I won’t let people try to shame me any longer. Ruth, God’s Promise didn’t work for me because my sexuality was never something that I could change. It is just part of who I am.”

 

Ruth huffed. “No, that just isn't true! You are sinning. Gravely sinning.”  Cam shot back “Have you ever wondered why Promise has never claimed to have actually cured anyone? Because it can’t be done!”

 

Grandma continued. “What was so bad about God’s Promise that you ran away? And why did you stay away five years? Do you know what it’s like not knowing if your granddaughter is alive or dead?”

 

Cam was starting to get emotional and crying. “Well, I am sorry that you were worried about me, but you have got to remember this started with Ruth and you. You sent me away, you rejected me, you forced me into Promise, you banished me from this house! It wasn’t a case of me running away, it was just a case of me deciding when to return.”

 

“God’s Promise taught us everyday to hate ourselves. They told us over and over the lie that our normal God given sexual attractions were not natural but were grave sins. The same shit you are trying to peddle right now, Ruth. They beat our self esteem into the ground. And guess what? Everyone, _everyone_ fails because they are trying to do something that’s impossible! They can’t change the essence of who they are!”

 

Cam was really upset now. She continued, yelling and crying. “And Mark, poor Mark! He tried so hard to change and couldn’t. Both Lydia and his father demeaned him constantly. In pure frustration, he sliced up his genitals. I knew at that moment that Promise was a fraud and dangerous.”

 

Cam was in full fledged meltdown now. “And where were you Ruth? Promise has a disciple slicing and dicing his dick, and you don’t investigate whether I am safe? You never contacted me to ask how I was, whether I was being abused or feeling desperate like Mark. Nothing, nada. You abandoned me! I knew at that moment that I couldn’t be there any longer. I had to escape, because you sure as hell weren’t going to rescue me!”

 

Ruth countered weakly. “Lydia assured me everything was fine.”

 

Cameron threw up her hands in total exasperation and ran to the backyard sobbing. Ruth and Grandma just sat in silence, not knowing how to react. Ray said, “Give her some space.” She’ll come back when she’s ready.”

 

Twenty minutes later Cam was back, sort of calmed down and resumed her story. “Once I had escaped, I had to stay away and under the radar until I was 18 because if you found me you would have just hauled me back to Promise or someplace worse. After that, I wanted to graduate high school before I returned. I did that. I graduated, with honors, just last month and now I’m planning for college.”

 

There was no reaction to her school news. She thought maybe they didn't hear her. She said "What do you think of that, I finally got my high school diploma!" Ruth shot back, "Well if you stayed at Promise you would have had it a lot sooner!" Grandma shouted at Ruth "Goddammit Ruth, can't you give her credit for anything? I'm sure that was difficult under the circumstances." She looked at Cam and said "Well done, I'm proud of you."

 

Then Cam got to the heart of the reason for her long absence. "But, besides finishing high school, I think I stayed away for so long because I feared your rejection, and today has proven me correct.”

 

“What do you mean?”, asked Ruth.

 

Cam asked, “Ruth, can you accept me as a gay woman?”, “Well, no” Ruth answered. “Your lifestyle goes against God’s plan for men and women.”

 

“How about you, Grandma?”. She squirmed. “No, probably not”

 

“How about Judy and our living together? Both answered quickly, in unison. “No.”

 

“That’s your answer”

 

Cameron asked, “Can I go look at my old room?” Grandma said “Of course.” When Cameron entered her room, she saw that little had changed since she left after the Christmas break so long ago. It was pretty much as she had left it, except that there were two boxes of the stuff she had in her Promise dorm that had been packed and shipped back. The room was dusty and dirty, it looked like Ruth hadn't touched it.

 

She laid on the bed, looked around. She remembered her sleepovers with Irene, countless movies played on the VCR, decorating the dollhouse. But it was as if the events happened to someone else. Why was that? She didn’t know. She thought about the conversation that she just had with Ruth and Grandma, and realized that they still regarded her as a sinner, maybe even more so now that she was living with Judy. She started crying asking herself why they couldn’t love her, accept her for the person she was? Ruth and Grandma’s “you are a sinner” attitude to her was no different than what she heard every day at God’s Promise, minus Lydia’s psychobabble.

 

She knew then that she had to leave her relationship with Ruth and Grandma, and Miles City, just as she had to leave Promise.

 

She looked around for things from her room, her childhood that she wanted to keep. The picture of her 12-year-old mom at Rock Creek campground, the Campfire Girls book from Margot, her swimming and track ribbons, her swimsuits that she had left behind at Promise. She emptied one of the Promise boxes and put her items in it.

 

She also had not given Ruth or Grandma her address or phone number. She wrote them on a piece of paper and left them on her old desk. A last look around, and she went downstairs. As she passed through the living room, she said that the box had all the mementos from her room that she wanted to keep. They could dispose of everything else and use the room for whatever they wanted. “What about the dollhouse?” said Grandma clearly distressed that Cam didn’t want it. “Just give it to somebody, anybody. I don’t want any memories of this house other than what I put in this box.” Grandma realized in that moment how deeply hurt Cam must be. But she didn’t do or say anything about it.

 

Cam went out to the car with the box, and then returned to the living room and said, “I’m leaving now, I left my address and phone number on my old desk. Write or call if you want, or don’t – your choice. But forget about the you are a sinner shit. If you can't accept who I am, don't bother calling or writing.”  Grandma started crying, pleading. “Please don’t leave like this. Please don't. Can't we talk about this some more? " Ruth stayed silent.

 

Cam sobbed “I don’t know what else to say. I came today to try to resume a relationship with you after being away for five years, being honest and upfront about the person I have become including my relationship with Judy.  I am proud of who I have become, you just see me as a sinner. I know you are upset, Grandma and I'm sorry that you are. But please see it from my perspective. Your disapproval, I would even say rejection of my lifestyle and choice of life partner is deeply hurtful." 

 

“I wanted to be a family again. But family is the one place in the world where you are accepted for who you are and are loved unconditionally. And I sure as hell don’t feel the love of family right now.”

 

Grandma asked apprehensively, “When are you coming back?” Cam sobbed “I’m not.”

 

Cam walked to the car, got in and drove off, the three of them just standing in the doorway staring at her driving towards Main Street. Before that day, they always held out hope that Cam would come back, and she did. But today they feared that Cam was never coming back again.

 

Judy was waiting for Cam at the airport on Sunday evening. Cam had phoned Judy the previous evening and told her, through tears, what happened in Miles City. When Cam entered the arrivals area, Judy walked over quietly to Cam, hugged her, and just said “I love you.” Cam said, “I can’t talk about this right now, but I promise I will in a day or two.” Judy whispered, “Whenever you are ready, I’m here.” They walked silently to the bus stop and started the long three bus ride to their apartment. They held hands, and Cam rested her head on Judy’s shoulder. Little was said, but Cam felt Judy’s love and concern. She knew that with Judy she would get through this. Once home, they both went to bed and Judy held Cam till she fell asleep.

 

A few days later Cam and Judy were relaxing on the couch and Cam said “Last Saturday I think I did the only thing I could have done. If I hadn’t cut ties with Ruth and Grandma, it would have been like staying at Promise. I just don't want to keep hearing that my, our, lifestyle is wrong, at least from family. I guess a stronger person could live with that, but I’m just not up to it. I want to rid my life of that kind of shit and move forward. If cutting ties, even with family is what it takes, so be it." Cam started crying. " _But it hurts, it really hurts._ You, Jane, Adam, Margot, Lindsey, her mom and Mona are my family now. I love all of you.”

 

They hugged and kissed, and in that moment, Cam knew that everything would be OK and she could move on with her life.

 

Six months later, Cam and Judy moved from Seattle to Bellingham, Washington and Cam started her freshman year at Western Washington University in the kinesiology program.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, Cam has made a life for herself post Promise. She's in a relationship, has graduated from high school and is off to college. Unfortunately, she is still estranged from Ruth and Grandma.


End file.
